• Dec. 1: Police contacted a suspicious hombre at 11:30 p.m. in the 900 block of Morro Bay Blvd. The 39-year-old dingus had a warrant from another county, so of course he was cited and released, a case of maybe it’ll take this time.
• Dec. 1: Police contacted yet another winner at 9:47 p.m. in the 400 block of Monterey. This model citizen had three bench warrants and got took to jail.
• Dec. 1: The red light roundup continued when police contacted a lady scofflaw, 62, at 8:30 p.m. at Coleman Drive and the Embarcadero. The apparent dune dweller had outstanding arrest warrants and was most excellently hauled to the hoosegow.
• Dec. 1: Police responded to a car vandalism at 5:21 p.m. in a parking lot in the 1200 block of Embarcadero. Logs indicated police contacted “all parties” and the case was turned over to the District Attorney for potential inaction.
• Dec. 1: Meanwhile up the street a few blocks… someone reported a crash-n-dash in the 400 block of Embarcadero.
• Dec. 1: Police contacted a fellow with a bench warrant at 12:30 p.m. in the 700 block of Quintana, no doubt at the illustrious Creek Bed Estates. The 45-year-old gent was also nicked for suspicion of possession of drugs, paraphernalia and of course a probation violation, this not being the gaggle head’s first rodeo.
• Dec. 1: Police responded to the 300 block of Embarcadero after someone reported that his dinghy got pinched.
• Nov. 30: Police caught up to a suspicious fellow at 11 a.m. in the Southbound Hwy 1 off ramp. The apparent swagman had a felony arrest warrant and was checked into the Parkinson Plaza.
• Nov. 29: Police responded to the 200 block of Atascadero Rd. for a suspected case of attempted extortion or blackmail.
• Nov. 29: Police stopped a suspicious vehicle at 8:24 p.m. at Harbor and Morro Bay Boulevard, literally in the middle of town. Logs indicated the 61-year-old driver was pinched for suspicion of driving on tarantula juice.
• Nov. 27: Police stopped a suspicious vehicle at 7 p.m. at South Bay Boulevard and Teresa Dr. Logs indicated the 25-year-old driver was hooked up for allegedly driving on panther sweat.
• Nov. 27: Police responded at 3:13 p.m. to the Family Dollar Store in the 400 block of Quintana where some thief stole undisclosed items. The sticky-fingered master criminal couldn’t be identified.
• Nov. 26: Police are investigating vandalism at Lila Keiser Park, as the graffidiots strike again.
• Nov. 25: Police responded at 12:21 p.m. to the 500 block of Quintana for a report of some creep playing whack-a-ding-dong and exposing his apparent shortcomings. Police nabbed the 22-year-old fellow for suspicion of possessing drugs and paraphernalia, and indecent exposure in a public place.
• Nov. 24: Police espied a sneaky 52-year-old fellow lurking around at 11:30 p.m. on the Hwy 1 southbound overpass at Morro Bay Boulevard. Logs indicated he was pipped at the post for alleged possession of illegal drugs and paraphernalia.
• Nov. 24: Police responded at 7:40 p.m. to State Park Road and South Bay Boulevard for a reported crash-n-dash accident.
• Nov. 24: Police were called at 7:50 p.m. to the 300 block of Morro Bay Blvd., where some member of the illuminasty was committing an unspecified lewd act, though one might imagine. The public menace was apparently gone when they arrived.
• Nov. 24: Police contacted a return customer, 38, at 10:22 a.m. in the 300 block of Surf St., who had a warrant. He was issued a second disappearance ticket and released.
• Nov. 23: At 10:55 p.m. police contacted a suspicious fellow in the 400 block of Morro Bay Blvd. Logs indicted the 50-year-old chap had five bench warrants. While arresting the scofflaw, police allegedly discovered illegal drugs and paraphernalia in his possession, adding more woe to his miseries.
• Nov. 23: At 9:19 a.m. police contacted a regular customer in the 800 block of the Boulevard. The 62-year-old she-devil had a bench warrant, was issued a new notice to appear and let go to catch another day.
• Nov. 23: Someone parked illegally in the 1700 block of Embarcadero and police had the offending vehicle towed away, once again making the world safe for democracy.
• Nov. 22: Police responded around 9:26 a.m. to a car crash at the Roundabout at MBB and Quintana.
• Nov. 21: Police stopped a suspicious vehicle at 6:39 p.m. in the 1800 block of Main. Logs indicated the driver, 38, was popped for suspicion of driving on a suspended license, while high on drugs, and alleged possession of nitrous oxide, which is no laughing matter.
• Nov. 21: At 5:43 p.m., police charged down to the 300 block of MBB for a battery charge. No arrest was made.
• Nov. 20: Police responded at 7:13 p.m. to a store in the 300 block of MBB. Logs indicated a male, “attempted to cash a check at Morro Bay Market & Spirits presenting an ID not belonging to him,” reads the log. The suspected chiseler was identified and an arrest is no doubt imminent.
• Nov. 20: Police contacted a suspicious dude at 3:20 p.m. in the 600 block of Harbor. The 43-year-old model citizen was arrested for suspicion of possession of illegal drugs.
• Nov. 20: Police towed off another hooligan vehicle parked too long in the 600 block of Vista.
• Nov. 19: A citizen in the 2700 block of Juniper reported getting harassing phone calls from some unnamed
harasstard.
• Nov. 19: Police responded to the 500 block of Monterey for a reported stalking case. According to logs, from 8 a.m. on Nov. 13 to 12:30 p.m. Nov. 19 “a misdemeanor stalking occurred,” after which the tool apparently moved on to new obsessions.
• Nov. 19: Logs logged a report of theft occurring at the high school on Atascadero Road. No word on the booty pinched or the scalawag responsible, but suspects are no doubt aplenty.
• Nov. 19: Police towed away another offensive vehicle parked at Radcliff and Little Morro Creek Road, as the DMV beast hadn’t yet been paid its blood. They towed another car from the 400 block of Atascadero Rd., as it too had expired tags.
• Nov. 18: Some evildoer vandalized an innocent car parked in the 2900 block of Birch sometime between noon on Nov. 15 and 8 am. the following day. No suspect was identified, but he better hope the owner ever finds out.
• Nov. 18: Someone turned in a firearm they were shootin’ for police to destroy.
• Nov. 18: Police and fire responded at 11:49 a.m. to a brush fire next to the Southbound Hwy 1 on ramp at Morro Bay Blvd. Logs indicated it was deemed an arson but the firebug was not caught this time. The fire burned up some grass and bushes.